Privacy Policies

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1. We will never give your name and contact information to anyone. Period.
2. You, on the other hand, are free to give our name and contact information to everyone.
3. We’d love to know as much about you as possible because it helps us to listen better and respond better. And it helps to create a website and products that are more relevant to the strange circumstances of your world.
4. Anything that you tell us will be shared under your name only if you want us to share it and if it makes at least some sort of sense for us to share it.
5. There’s a difference between private and reclusive. You want us to help you, talk to you, and send things to you? Be specific—pretend you’re giving ransom instructions. We don’t have time for coquettishness.
6. We administrate our own mailing list. It is highly doubtful someone is going to break into our database for the purpose of stealing your name and address. Don’t flatter yourself.
7. Should we ever contract with a third party for database administration or info distribution, we’ll check ’em out ahead of time and make sure they comply with our privacy policies. We will stand up for any problems ourselves before blaming someone else. The people at slap are accountability freaks.
8. From time to time we’ll be inspired to ask survey questions of everybody. The information will be shared in the aggregate and your individual comments will only be shared by name if you say okay.
9. We don’t link our site to other sites unless it’s someone we really know and trust. If we have another site to recommend to you we’ll recommend it by address rather than a direct link. A pain in the butt but we’re doing it to protect your privacy.
10. slapcompany.com is a safe place. Rage on. We’ve got your back.